Take Care of You: A Self-Care Guide

(Originally written in 2015)

I was prompted to speak on this topic after several days of sadness. The sadness wasn’t overwhelming, it was very subtle. Me being me, I started to question where the feelings were coming from because they didn’t feel like mine. I know me. As I took the time to follow the feelings, I realized most of them were in fact coming from outside sources. As an empath (a highly sensitive being that can feel and sometimes absorb, the energy of the people, places, and things in its environment) I have to be very careful about the things I subject myself to. Everything is energy so it is very easy to get caught up in the undertow of low vibrating frequencies such as fear, hate, and sadness. ESPECIALLY when thats all you see around you! I figured if I’m feeling it, others probably are too. So, I want to help by letting you know how I keep my vibe high, especially during trying times.

Monitoring your intake: I don’t watch traditional news often. It can be very triggering and fear mongering, and it is very unhealthy in large amounts. Unfollow negative people. Stop talking to people that only gossip, complain, or have a generally pessimistic view of life. Everything is energy, be conscious of the energy you take in.

Read/Research: Google is my best friend any time I have a question I type it into google and I come across one thing that will lead me to another, then another, and then another.  All that I know, is that I don’t know much so I strive every day to learn something new whether it be from google, youtube, books, or tuning in to Spirit to see what lessons they have for me. Knowledge is Power. No one can take that from you. Remember, no matter what you read you DO NOT have to take it all as truth, only take what resonates with you. Everything isn’t for you and thats okay. Know yourself.

Conscious Breathing: By focusing on my breath I am able to center myself, especially at times when I feel confused, upset, or at a loss for words. We take breathing for granted a lot of times, and because we aren’t thinking about our breaths our brains and bodies aren’t getting the optimal amount of oxygen. This can contribute to our stress levels among other things. Practice breathing by imagining the breath coming up through your feet and out of the top of your head. Another trick is to breathe in and fill your belly up, and to push the air out with a sigh, making your stomach go flat.

Drink Water: Water is Life. You can even charge your water with crystals, love and good intentions if you need a quick pick me up. Water is easily programmed, (we are like 60% water so we too, are easily programmed by the energy around us.)

Baths: Baths have become an essential part of my self-care. I throw my favorite crystals (the ones that are safe to be put in water) in the tub, start the water and charge my bath with loving intentions. Doing this in the morning helps prepare me for the day and at night it helps wash off the day and any energies I may be holding that aren’t mine. WATER IS LIFE.

Grounding: I get out into nature and I take my shoes off and plant them in the ground, and I sit and listen and watch nature. I learn a lot from nature, everything  happens as its supposed to without being prompted by anyone or anything. That reminds me to Just Be which can be very hard because I am a recovering control freak.

Meditation: I take the time to get still and clear my mind of incessant thoughts. If you’re a beginner, don’t worry so much about the thoughts disappearing, just make sure you’re letting the thoughts come and go without identifying with and attaching to them. It took me a couple of years to be able to meditate on my own with a clear mind. Up until that point I would use guided meditations on Youtube, or, I’d be in a meditative state with thoughts floating though my head. I just watched them and let them pass. Sometimes even verbally saying “No thank you” to the thoughts.

Listening to my Intuition:  I find that when I heed my inner pullings and that tiny voice inside, it is easier to be happy because I am in the flow of the universe, magnitizong all things for my highest good.

Crystal Healing: Very early on into my spiritual journey I was introduced to healing stones.. not quite sure how, probably Tumblr, anyway, I purchased a Shiva Lingam because I was hell bent on reuniting with an ex and Shiva stones promote the union of Yin and Yang (female and male) energies. When I held the stone it began to vibrate in my hand, I thought I was losing it so I put it in the other hand, same effect… still skeptical I loosened my grip on it, it was still vibrating in my hand. From there my love affair with crystals began. Healing stones come directly from the Earth and are programed with nature’s energy. Nature is the oldest and one of the most powerful forces. Everything comes from nature one way or another. I find my crystals by either googling things like “healing stones for depression” or “healing stones for insomnia” etc. I also get put on to a lot of crystals by some of the people I follow on Instagram. I like to go into my local magick shop and  look at the selection of stones and let them choose me. I choose the ones that call out to me without even knowing their healing properties, then when I get home and look them up the stone is ALWAYS just what I need at the time. Good starter stones are Amethyst, Clear Quartz, and Rose Quartz. All stones with very palpable energy.

Self Pleasure: Yep thats what I mean. Masturbate. Sexual energy is the most powerful creative energy around. Get to know yourself and your orgasm. I’ve transitioned from traditional sex toys to healing ones that are non toxic. You can find some great healing wands at chakrubs.com. I have a white jade one. Just like my other stones this one has a powerful energy.  You can set your intention for your orgasm. You can choose to circulate the energy within your body, allowing it to clear your chakras and boost your vibration. Or, you can intend to use the energy for creative endeavors. Before you begin, set the mood, you owe yourself romance, plus, it’ll increase the intensity of the orgasm. Turn off the lights, light a candle or two and some incense, play some music. Then give yourself a massage with coconut oil, paying attention to how you feel. Taking this time will allow you to really learn what your body likes, then you can teach your partner. Take control of your pleasure. Once you’re ready, begin, and take your time. There is no need to rush your orgasm, be gentle with yourself.  If you want to know more about the power of an orgasm, you should research it. Sacred Sex is real and it is healing.

Florida Water: I dab on this magical cologne and it instantly changes or settles my mood, I also use it to ward off negative energy. I get the Murray & Lanman brand from Amazon.

Essential Oils: Much like healing stones, essential oils have properties that attract certain effects. Like I do with my crystals, I look up oils based on what I’m going through and need help with. The ones I tend to keep on hand are patchouli, frankincense, rose-geranium, tea tree, and rosemary. I use these oils in various combinations to lift my mood, attract desires, and as a natural perfume.

Drink Tea: Tea time is my most favorite time of the day. I get to sit with a huge cup of steaming hot tea in the morning and  in the evening, and in this time I am able to unwind and enjoy about 5-10 minutes of stillness. I love organic loose leaf tea blends.

Mantras: I’ve been aware of mantras since my journey began, but I didn’t begin to put them into regular use until recently. A mantra is a sentence or paragraph of positive/affirming words that you say to yourself throughout the day/every day. Your words do have power, so using them in an empowering way can begin to shift things for you. An all encompassing mantra is: “I Am Love, I Am Enough, I Am Grateful, I Am Healthy. Abundance flows to me and through me with ease. I Am Open to all The Universe has for me in my highest good.” Use this one or create one to suit your personal needs. By using mantra’s you are moving energy in a way that allows The Universe to respond to what you are saying.  Remember believing is seeing, not the other way around.

Lighting Incense/Sage/Palo Santo: The ancient practice of burning these herbs/wood/resins helps clear the energy in your space, ridding it of stagnant and negative energy. I get most of these products from Amazon

Astrology: Astrology is important to me. The stars align in a way that affects the energy on earth and therefore affects the energy of human beings. If you’re skeptical read Astrology by Osho. A lot of what you see in mainstream media is junk astrology. Essential astrology involves getting your natal chart done so that you can look at where the planets were positioned at your exact time of birth, this astrology is catered specifically to you.

Awareness: I stay as present in each moment as I can. Practicing awareness enables me to understand myself and what I need. It helps me to pinpoint emotions that feel foreign and work on finding out where they may have come from, and then release them. Being aware allows me to not be fooled by a lot of things. Im able to see through everything because I am actively participating in my life, Im not just taking things at face value.

RADICAL SELF CARE: All of the above mentioned are part of this. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. You owe it to yourself to be the best you, you can be. Rest, read, play, laugh, cry, share love, be love, make love, paint, dance, sing, whatever you do just take care of yourself. Rid your space of people, places, and things that do not grow you or grow with you. Let go of baggage that it not yours. Evolve, remove yourself from patterns that are no longer serving you. PACK LIGHT. This journey is hilly and you can’t move up hill very gracefully carrying years and lifetimes worth of baggage. Practice letting go of it, its much easier to be happy that way. Here’s another mantra my best friend and I came up with that can help you with letting go. “As I let go, I surrender to the flow of The Universe” Letting go is a lifetime process. Move courageously and with determination. Love on You. You deserve it I promise. We need you, and we need you healthy and well. Eat whole foods, exercise, drink tons of water. Do what you think you can’t.

I have a wonderful physical tribe that I lean on, and since we are in the age of technology, I have also built a virtual tribe that I can lean on. People I’ve never met in the physical and some I’ve never even spoken to, yet I find myself resonating deeply with them and their messages.

1. Bri Braggs: @fertilealchemy & @fertilapothocary on Instagram, fertilealchemy.com

2.Hasnaa At-Tahuidi: @vibrationalmedicine & @resonanceapothecary on Instagram, Hasnaa At-Tauhidi on Youtube

3. Alex Elle: @alexelle, @thebalmco, @loveyourlines on Instagram, anthrsnday.com, alexandraelle on Tumblr

4. House of Vuu: @houseofvuu on Instagram, houseofvuu.com

5. Nancy: @astrologyangelmediums on Instagram and Facebook

6. Mama Ella: samoryshealing@gmail.com, samorysherbs.com, @nutritionalhealing on Instagram

7. Nerissa Irving: @Nerissanefeteri, @neneorganics, @naturotica on Instagram, Nerissa Irving on Youtube

8. Dorian Johnson: thefemmefocus.com, @thefemmefocus on Instagram, thefemmefocus on Youtube

9. Bashar: BasharCommunications on Youtube

10. Mooji: Moojiji on Youtube

11. Alyssa Sharpe: alyssasharpe.com, Alyssa Sharpe on Youtube

12. Osho: osho.com -Osho in Amazon Books

13. Tatianna Tarot: @tatiannatarot on Instagram, tatianna tarot on Youtube

14. Ashley’s Naturals: @ashleysnaturals on Instagram, ashleysnaturals.com

15. Thema Azize Serwa: thewombsauna.com Thema Azize Serwa on YT

16. The Hoodwitch: @thehoodwitch on Instagram, thehoodwitch.com